Fake Love? | True Love Shouldn’t Make You Feel Like This
Love can be scary. Love can be tame. Love can be anything you want it to be. But naturally, most of us would prefer for ours to embody the best definition of true love possible — one that is happy, healthy and fulfilling.
Sadly, there are also romantic relationships that are very far from the common picture we see. Their love doesn’t feel like a fair and respectful partnership, doesn’t provide a safe space or even feels fulfilling.
As a critical rule of thumb, if your “love” negatively affects your self-esteem, physical health or mental sanity, then you should reconsider this relationship. What’s the point of staying in a “love” if it’s not helping your overall wellbeing?
While no relationship is perfect, you shouldn’t settle for a toxic position and should never feel these 7 things in your love life:
Belittled. A loving partner should appreciate you, flaws and all. However, if all your partner does is criticize your mistakes and make you feel small to make themselves seem the better person in your relationship, it’s high time you find someone else who accepts you better.
Alone. You should consider moving on from your partner if they can’t even offer you companionship. When they put you behind someone else and neglect your needs, then there isn’t much in your partnership, is there? Ironically, you’d be better off alone.
Afraid. If it’s for the future of the relationship or of your goals as a couple, then a little uncertainty and fear are warranted. However, if all you feel is being afraid of your partner or of your safety with them, then it’s high time that you move out right now. You should be able to find love that makes you confident, not fearful.
Worthless. When it’s your mental health and sense of self-value that’s on the line, you should never compromise or settle for less even if it’s for someone you love. No one should make you feel unworthy of things, no matter what you bring or don’t bring into a relationship, romantic or otherwise.
Used. Whether it be physically, emotionally, psychologically or financially, you don’t deserve to be treated as something your partner can simply use for their own selfish benefit. If you feel that you are being taken advantage of, it usually is true.
Trapped. There is a saying that true love should make you grow and learn new things rather than shrink and be perpetually helpless. If your partner is controlling to the point of making you believe that you don’t have any other better option than them, they are obviously trapping you in a situation favored towards them. But, in the back of your mind, you know you have the power to move on from this, and you must use it. Don’t accept being stuck and stagnant with a fruitless love.
Obligated. The amount of effort that you put into the relationship must be mirrored by your partner. And you must want to be “in” it rather than feel that you have to be in it. The relationship must be based on love, attraction, dedication and honesty, and not a weird sense of duty. One-sided has love never succeeded.
Every relationship has to go through challenges and issues, but if what you face are some of the ones we listed above, then it may be time to let go. It is not selfish and is even recommended to take care of yourself first before committing to another person.
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